i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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