i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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