I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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