As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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