Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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