Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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