PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
