I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Semen is not good for contacts.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
