Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
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