Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
