I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
