Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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