I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
i wish my penis had a tongue
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
