I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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