is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
