it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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