ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize