Having a random hookup so left but love u
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Randomize
