She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
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