And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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