She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
