i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
We're too hungover to prance.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
