I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
