My brain says no but my pants say off.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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