You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
