I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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