Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
