How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Why can't burritos get me drunk
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
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