Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
