Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
