well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
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