why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
