You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
