I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I checked into jail on foursquare
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
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