3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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