Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
