What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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