maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
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