Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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