What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
