And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
