Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I have already put on my inside pants.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
