I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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