the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
