Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I need to wash the frat house off of me
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
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