i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
