can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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