who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
