i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
