There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
